The disgraced cyclist, 43, has been cited in a December hit-and-run for which his girlfriend, Anna Hansen, initially took the blame, officials say. PHOTOS: Unforgettable sports scandals According to a police report obtained by Us Weekly, Armstrong and Hansen were on their way back from a museum party at the St. Lance Armstrong is perhaps America's biggest dick. Or was she trying to cover Armstrong's sorry ass further by giving their relationship a nicer sheen of respectability? Hansen later told the cops:"We've had our family name smeared over every paper in the world in the last couple of years and honestly, I've got teenagers, I just wanted to protect my family," Hansen told police. He is a complete and total fraud, a misogynist, and a gross human being. Before the turn of the new year Lance Armstrong, who cheated his way to the top of the game (why), hit two cars in Aspen after "a night of partying." (Why a 43-year-old man with multiple children is out "partying" in Aspen and then driving home is up for explanation.) Lance, wanting to "avoid headlines," let his girlfriend and the mother of a few of his children, Anna Hansen, A man who had been renting one of the damaged cars told a police detective that Hansen came running up to his house in high heels, apologizing and promising to pay for the repairs."She said, `I'm Anna, we're the Armstrongs, my husband's Lance, he was just driving maybe too fast around the corner or something," the man told police, according to the reports. "I thought, gosh, Anna Hansen hit some cars, it's not going to show up in the papers, but Lance Armstrong hit some cars, it's going to be a national story."Anna, there is a solution to your woes: Leave the fucker.
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